Ikigai: Finding Happiness In Doing What You Love

Fall weather is here and I love it! I feel most alive and energized when the sky is grey and there is a slight drizzle of cold rain. Not a popular point of view here in the Pacific Northwest, where everyone lives for sunny days – but hey! I grew up in the tropics; I’ve had more than my share of sun!

Weather like this calls for a warm scarf, a cuddly kitty (luckily I have the perfect one), and a feel-good book! I picked up exactly such a book for the weekend. This latest in a long series of globally-themed life improvement manuals is not from Scandinavia but from Japan! I seriously can’t resist all of these cute little books so of course I had to check this one out!

So, you all remember Hygge – the Danish concept of finding contentment in coziness – well, ikigai is all about finding joy in working on your life’s purpose. And your own personal ikigai is the intersection of what you’re good at and what you love doing.

Makes a lot of sense! I am a firm believer that having goals, and dreams, and a raison d’etre can help you find focus and contentment -even if other things in your life aren’t always going according to plan. When you find your passion and you are able to find a way to work on that passion, your whole life changes. The little things in life don’t get to you as much – you have your purpose to keep you focused and on track.

This book is filled with scientific facts, anecdotal evidence, and interviews with some of the world’s oldest people. I look forward to reading it this weekend.

Three Steps For Dealing With Setbacks

Setbacks happen to everyone. Whether you’re building your own business, trying to lose weight, or fostering better relationships with family members. Things can’t go smoothly all the time, that’s just a fact of life, but don’t get so caught up on the ‘downs’ that you forget the many ‘ups’ that got you to where you are at this point.

However, just because setbacks happen doesn’t mean it’s the end of your dream. The key is to stop thinking of setbacks as failures and see them, instead, as a natural part of the process and a real opportunity for growth.

Here are some ways to deal with setbacks:


You just faced a setback! This means that something happened to derail plans that you’ve been working really, really hard on. That’s harsh and deserves a suitable period of mourning. Give yourself that time to feel bad for yourself and don’t feel guilty about it. But, and this is key to achieving anything, make that time finite. Set yourself a limit and then start the rebuilding process.


When things don’t go well, our emotions go into overdrive and it’s difficult to see things as they really are. However, although it’s really painful to see things that we have worked really hard for not go according to plan, now, more than ever, it’s important to stop for a while. Do nothing on impulse, don’t succumb to the pressure to ‘fix things now’ , and step back from the situation. When you’ve cleared your head and can see the facts without emotional bias, that’s when you can truly start figuring out your next moves. Ask yourself what went wrong. How did you and other factors contribute to this? What could you have done differently? What can you do to help things now -objectively, not emotionally. Write these things down so you can see them concretely in front of you.


It’s important, when we have goals, to look at the big picture. The better health a year from now, the publishing of your first book, or a happier home life. These things can keep us going. However, sometimes it helps just to think of getting through things a day at a time. Don’t think of how hard a year of waking up early to write your book, or a year of changing your diet will be – just tell yourself you just need to make it to tomorrow. If you’ve just been thrown a huge setback, ask yourself what you can do to make things better tomorrow. And then, the next tomorrow. And the one after that.  Soon, you’ll be back in the swing of things again!

And above all, remember this : only people who take risks, work hard to follow their dreams, or even just HAVE dreams to begin with, face setbacks in the first place! It means you’re out there working towards something. And THAT is a good and brave thing.